It took awhile before the Face of Everyman recognized his Uncle Pyro standing near the cabana huts. Few visitors to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa looked so bad. Unca’ P was a refugee from Easter Island. He was slated to become one of those famous monoliths but escaped, in a tourist’s luggage disguised as a maquette. The spa had their work cut out for themselves to get his face to shine like basalt.