For months secret Jet Pack tests had been conducted by the Face of Everyman. The pre-dawn hours at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa were ideal. Few spectators even realized the import of these tests to National Security.
Johnny Dark Eyes was out of county lockup courtesy of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa penal system’s annual holiday clemency release program. the Face of Everyman always feared the worst; and sure enough . . . Johnny started pushing a new pyramid scheme: Christmas Tree Futures.
Battle lines were clearly drawn here in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. the Face of Everyman regretted distributing the good stuff this early in the day. Waiting for the lunch crowd to assemble would have been a much better idea; less conflict.
the Face of Everyman awoke from his nap to discover a veritable invasion of noisy Jays gleaning the choices morsels of holiday largess courtesy of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. He addressed them sharply; suggesting that they return to their mountain top conifers.
“Drowned Rat, indeed”. Egbert didn’t care what he looked like; these Sunflower seeds were not going to be left rotting in the rain. The Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had enjoyed several days of rain. The meager rations distributed by the Face of Everyman were there to be eaten by somebody. Better he than those stupid pigeons.
Dimitri of Flood Control was pleased to report to the Face of Everyman that the flood gates at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had held and waters were receding. With that good news the venerable sage decided to take a well deserved nap.
Hercules could not believe his eyes. There before him was the fabled white rabbit Harvey. At last he could have a meaningful discussion with someone; not these birdbrains at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Of course he did not include the Face of Everyman in that category.
It wasn’t until he started to slide backward that LeRoy realized that he was surrounded by thin ice. The Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had turned on the water heaters but they had failed to keep up with the temperature extremes. the face of Everyman was once again faced with an unbudgeted expense.
As a lark Smedley from Triple A had brought along his drinking buddies; Arley from Lonely Planet USA, and Robre from Michelin to inspect the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Each were shaking their heads as one discrepancy after another was discovered. Many were repeats from last year when the Face of Everyman had barely hung on to his two star rating. Somehow things always seemed to go from bad to worse.
Mullard had sent away for a correspondence course in ventriloquism. Seen above he is demonstrating his new found skills to the Face of Everyman. Most guests at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa were too polite to point out that his lips were moving. The venerable sage sought words of encouragement rather than criticize. Ultimately Mullard asked for his money back.
