Once again, under the cover of darkness, a cadre of highly trained marauders struck at the very heart of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. By diverting recirculation water meant for the Spring of Eternal Giving the vast lagoon was emptied before sunrise. the Face of Everyman awoke only when he felt a cold draft on his bottom.
During the brief interlude when the Raccoons weren’t skylarking or terrorizing the Face of Everyman the neighborhood cat; Indiana Jones, took center stage and reclaimed his territorial rights to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Indie was a veteran of avoiding direct conflict but he knew that there would be a new crop of scrappy bandits born every couple of years. Maybe the venerable sage would sell him a some extra lives on credit.
The First of August brought open season on Crawdads at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Seen above, in grainy infrared security footage, is Rocky performing the ritual cleansing of his food before devouring the succulent crustacean. the Face of Everyman hoped that the ebbing tide would take the dismembered body parts off into deeper waters.
As the cherries ripened, then fermented, a new Rocky was born. Seen above at the posh watering hole of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa is a poor specimen of a wild beast newly hooked on Sour Cherry Amarretto. With his liquor stocks running low, the Face of Everyman might soon be faced with an obstreperous Procyon lotor.
Rocky had been filching red cherries from the kindly ol’ pensioner’s tree. He held up a paw to show the Face of Everyman the deep red color and begged to wash up as raccoons are want to do. The Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was very particular about the purity of the water. However, the venerable sage found the the thought of cherry flavored water intriguing. “Perhaps, just this once.”
Bonzo couldn’t remember much about the Toga Party held last night at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. He knew that he’d had fun because he felt so bad. First thing, he checked to see that his Frat Brothers hadn’t shaved off his eyebrows while he was unconscious. But it wasn’t until the Face of Everyman noticed the color of his tail that he knew something was different. Bonzo was now going blonde.