In a calculated passive aggressive power play the raccoons refused to to spin the Face of Everyman. The venerable sage of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had hoped to be twisted about and thus be able to absorb the bright morning sunlight for his right eye to treat his chronic seasonal affective disorder. His light therapy box is still on back order.
The few hours of sunlight that fell on this remote corner of the Pacific Flyway were the root cause of many reported cases of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). Hardest hit at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was the venerable sage himself. Even in the depths of his depression he could hope that the Raccoons would attack tonight and spin him around so that his other eye could catch the bright rays of sunrise. His Light Therapy Box was on backorder at Amazon.