Fernley was a born huckster. During the week he would collect items, found objects, and peddle them to guests at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Seen above in security camera file footage F is trying to convince the Face of Everyman that the beer can pull tab he offers is from an authentic Billy Carter can of beer. The venerable sage wasn’t falling for that line of baloney and asked for a certificate of provenance. Fernley quickly switched gears and offered a rusty skate key at fire sale prices.
Edwina had been egg-less for two seasons. She learned of the Face of Everyman; a great Shaman that lived at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The venerable sage was reputed to be of benefit to barren couples seeking parenthood. Above, seen in file footage; Everyman is employing guided imagery to assist the hopeful client achieve her dreams.
Langston had been on a Pub Crawl since the last Super Moon. How he came to be at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was a mystery. the Face of Everyman found his presence an enigma. Could it be that there was a trace of South Boston in his accent? County Cork, perhaps?
Jackdaw had been born with an extremely rare condition; best described as alternating lazy eye. The modest clinic at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was without resources to correct this abnormality. J’s parents became resigned and were about to move to a safer location. While deep in transcendental meditation the Face of Everyman envisioned small eye-glasses with kaleidoscope lenses. Within hours he had dashed off a learned paper for presentation at the annual eye wear congress in Stockholm and contracted with B & L to fabricate a series of prototypes. The young Crow went on to become a famous sideshow trick-shot artist. Detractors insist that he has an unfair advantage.
Bradford was about to realize his long held dream of creating a Casino here in the wilds of the Pacific flyway. He was in serious negotiation with the folks at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa; that is, until the State Gaming Commission insisted that untraceable Bitcoins be the only unit of payment. Even the Face of Everyman was surprised at this insurmountable roadblock to Free Enterprise. In his wisdom, the venerable sage suggested that B counter with an offer to use a mix of freshly minted Sacagawea and Susan B Anthony coins. The supply was known to be almost inexhaustible.
Complaints had reached city hall that the kindly ol’ pensioner was, once again, cutting corners on service by serving dreck. But, of course, who was dispatched to sample the service at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa and to right this terrible wrong? None other than “Road Kill” McGillicutty, of the local Carrion Club. RK always got a light buzz on soggy fermented corn and sunflower seeds. The posh resort retained it’s three star ranking despite the vehement protests of the Face of Everyman.
Ozwald told the story over and over again as long as someone else was buying the drinks at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. “I was returning from a secret night time sortie and as I was about to land I spotted incoming tracers. There, off my starboard wing, was The Blue Max, camouflaged as a Northwestern Crow. Jumping gee-hosa-fat, there was nothing else to do but clear my guns and roll into a classic aerial combat mode. Last I saw, he was trailing smoke.”
The venerable sage remained mute. He had his own “war stories”.