Pigeon

With an apology to Grant Wood the Face of Everyman entitled this portrait American Gothic. Several copies were available in the gift shop of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa.

The moment he saw the reflection of his own eyes, Bart went into a state of autohypnosis. This was a rare occurrence in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. the Face of Everyman was able to end the session with the snap of his fingers.

In the most dangerous situation in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa; Earl felt in peril. the Face of Everyman could only repeat his stoic advice: “Mind the gap.”

They all agreed that this was the best Cinco de Mayo party ever held at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Even the Face of Everyman was pleased how his guacamole turned out.

Ozwald always was curious; and the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa offered much to spark one’s curiosity. the Face of Everyman tolerated him for a while then drifted off to sleep.

the Face of Everyman was remiss in Audobon census duties. Yet somehow he was reluctant to record only one pigeon visiting the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. He expected to do better next month.

Archival footage shows a guest at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa becoming the bravest new member of the Polar Bear Club. Note that the venerable sage, the Face of Everyman, appears cozy under a blanket of snow.

It suddenly occurred to the Face of Everyman that the monthly pigeon census report for the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had not been submitted in several months. Was it really required?

He was back; the Face of Everyman’s own Frankenstein feeding in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The venerable sage regretted ever trying to splice genes. It was a mistake.