torkelsbirds

Heckle found a glass float from an offshore fishing net during one of his beach cleanups along the vast shores of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa.  Thinking it might be edible if soaked long enough he brought it home.  the Face of Everyman suggested that he give it as an offering to one of the many spiritual dieties perhaps leave it at the shrine of Aceso, goddess of healing, so needed in these trying times.

For weeks Stanley had been pushing inland; leading an expedition searching for the sacred stone idol rumored to exist in the valley of the Foggy Bottoms.  No one could have been more surprised than he when the Face of Everyman greeted him and complemented him on his mating plumage.  Stanley had arrived in time for the start of Spring Rituals.

the Face of Everyman viewed with alarm that this newcomer was about to challange the Spring of Living Waters to a duel.  The ancient being was so tired of every hotshot gun slinger coming into town looking for trouble.  Clearly the signs at the gate read: the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa, a wild life sanctuary.  It was time someone ran for Sheriff.

The lure of freshwater bivalves was too much for some new arrivals to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa.  Parents of the Crow family found that standing on the Face of Everyman gave easy access to this tasty treat.  Of course there was never so much as a “By your leave.”

Rents were due the 1st of each month at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa.  Edgemont was one of few who hadn’t heard that roost and nesting rents had been suspended during this outbreak of Avian Flu.  Nevertheless the Face of Everyman chose to accept rents from those folks more affluent.  The small fresh water pearl went into the safe and a receipt was written. The ancient sage often said, “Do business as business whenever possible.”

the Face of Everyman had so many worries that he lost track of the date.  Even here in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa there is a jokester.  Cheeky rushed up with news that something or other was amiss.  The venerable sage sputtered and seemed powerless to act.  Seeing that his joke fizzled Cheeky could only say: “April Fools.” And retreat.

To raise money for PPEs,  the Face of Everyman decided to televise an Arkansas Traveler joke contest from the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa.  Seen below a contestant tries out his jokes.  AT: Hey farmer you been living here all your life?  F: Nope. Not yet. 

Preacher Babcott was making his move to become a great television evangelist.  This weeks sermon, preached from the very epicenter of Avian Flu, was guaranteed to make him famous.  A serious distraction was that members of his flock continued to wander thru the set.  It seems that foraging for food was more important that receiving the message.  the Face of Everyman was powerless to prevent these needless interruptions.

Bambi’s Aunt Ena was awarded a no bid contract to prune the ornamental plants surrounding what would become the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa Easter Egg Hunt lawn.  Small start-ups often can’t afford safety equipment; which is really a shame.  the Face of Everyman called the village Fire Department to rescue the dear lady before she injured herself or some of his guests.  A call for bids was posted by the afternoon.

Bucko Billy returned to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa to check on his mail order prosthetic.  the Face of Everyman didn’t have the heart to tell him that the wrong leg had been shipped and that he had returned the item for the correct one.  Now, of course, the factory was shuttered.  The venerable sage could only recommend a support group for those missing a limb.  All-in-all things weren’t that bad; Saturday night dances had been cancelled until well after Easter.