Johnny Dark Eyes had been gone so long that no one could quite remember either his sentence or his crime. Nonetheless he was back. He hoped that the Face of Everyman knew where his Mother was roosting these days; it would brighten her day to see her First Born home, ready to be a an honest, productive citizen. Unfortunately his job as croupier at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa Casino was waiting for him. The venerable sage knew that no good would come of that employment. Johnny and other peoples money was a poor combination.
The famous quiz show, Jeopardy, is coming to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Seen above is Johnny Dark Eyes quizzing the Face of Everyman with practice questions. The venerable sage seems to be drawing a blank on many questions in the very categories he should know. Are the Gods trying to humble the world’s oldest citizen?
the Face of Everyman knew the diagnosis even before the young staff doctor made his pronouncement: contact dermatitis. A high tide coupled with high winds had driven an Algal Bloom right to the very spot inhabited by the venerable sage. It would take almost superhuman efforts by the kindly ol’ pensioner to return these waters to their pristine condition and magical pH number. It might be time to drain the swamp.
The village newspaper reported that today’s noontime UV rating for the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa would be One. Never-the-less Johnny Dark Eyes made sure that his beak was slathered in sunscreen; his preferred SPF 60, of course. the Face of Everyman tried not to smirk at this over abundance of caution.
the Face of Everyman was reluctant to ask favors of anyone especially of Johnny Dark-eyes. Lately in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa high winds were frequent and a mote of dust had landed in the eye of the venerable sage. Removing the spec might seem a simple enough task but Johnny would likely seek repayment ten times over. Dang! Double Dang!
Johnny Dark-eyes stepped forward at the urging of a variety of ground feeding birds. The petitioners addressed the manner in which the kindly ol’ pensioner scattered bird seed on the concrete pavers. Untold numbers of scratching birds had their toe nails worn to nubbins. Could the Face of Everyman intervene and request that feed be scattered on natural surfaces. “E” recognized the problem and demanded that management at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa lay Astro turf on a number of stones to alleviate this feeding crisis. No one was convinced that astro turf was the best solution. However, . . .