Match Making is always a work in progress at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. For a small honorarium the Face of Everyman brings together suitable singles interested in a long term relationship. Negotiations are not always smooth and a third party may be called upon to handle the tricky questions of the prenuptial agreement.
The Senior class at the Montetorkie School hoped to raise funds for their Fall trip to the nations capital to observe opening day at the Supreme Court. Thus was created the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa’s first ever car wash. Begrudgingly the Face of Everyman agreed to a light rinse and a thorough chamois wipe down. With all the horse play and lack of adult supervision he got little of either. His skin itched the rest of the morning.
Somewhere among the luncheon guests at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa a cell phone ring tone played “Yes sir, That’s my baby”. In pure Pavlovian conditioning Carlisle, broke into his old Buck & Wing Tap performance. This impromptu dance continued until the phone was silenced. the Face of Everyman recalled his own vaudeville days on the old Pacific Rim of Fire Orpheum circuit and mused that perhaps he should add a few popular ring tones to his mobile.
Elizabeth had promised herself that she’d have just one drink. A Long Island Iced Tea perhaps. Where’d be the harm? School was out for the Summer. Her student’s report cards sent home; all the textbooks returned; her next year’s teaching contract was on her desk. Here at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa the Face of Everyman had witnessed it all. The renown Montetorkie school had consumed many a promising teaching career. The continuing demand for excellence exceeded the grasp . . . In the end E settled on an open tab and a long afternoon of Cosmopolitans.
Fernley was a born huckster. During the week he would collect items, found objects, and peddle them to guests at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Seen above in security camera file footage F is trying to convince the Face of Everyman that the beer can pull tab he offers is from an authentic Billy Carter can of beer. The venerable sage wasn’t falling for that line of baloney and asked for a certificate of provenance. Fernley quickly switched gears and offered a rusty skate key at fire sale prices.
The Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa village newspaper was offering a prize for the best essay on What Father’s Day Means To Me. A few of the guys thought that if they brain stormed as a group they could come up with the prize winning essay. the Face of Everyman was bemused. Judging by the paucity of fledglings anywhere about; these bozos hadn’t a clue.
Whitey, The Bard was casting for his Summer Theater in the Park to be staged in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. He looked up when a voice asked if he was seeking experienced thespians. The funny looking polka dotted stranger had a foreign accent but could sure spout lines from Shakespear and assured W that he had a vast repertoire that he could call upon at will; casually mentioning the name of repertory theater that sounded vaguely familiar. the Face of Everyman tried to signal The Bard that this fellow would be more trouble than he was worth. In the end, the stranger flew off. Peace and good fellowship once again reigned over this magical setting.
Sacheverell stopped by the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa to share his good news with the Face of Everyman. A large insurance company had chosen S to be their national spokesperson and new corporate image. It was a ten year contract and required him to maintain his buff body and suave looks. His antlers were to be insured by Lloyds of London for an undisclosed amount in the event they became unsymmetrical or damaged in such a way as to prohibit public appearances. He was going to miss those dog tossing exhibitions at the county fair; but now his face was his fortune. C’est la vie.
Meryl and Beryl the Gemstone twins had been home schooled and were visiting the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa for the first time. They were critical to the Nth degree. the Face of Everyman had been enjoying the sweet fragrance of the Honey Suckle flower when voices behind him spoke in caustic tones. “Look at that floating garbage”. “Is this water safe for swimming?” Rather than respond to defend this posh spa; the venerable sage remained mute a he is sometimes wont to do.
The Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had a wide spectrum of guests and locals. the Face of Everyman was constantly surprised by what he overheard. Beatrix had been expecting her childhood friend Lance to propose. Instead he wanted to ask her thoughts on his sharing a loft with Maximilian that hot new bartender.
torkelsbirds 