Every year it was the same old story at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The School Board claimed that there may not be enough money to open the Montetorkie school. Moms met to talk about Home Schooling as an alternative. About the only topics they could agree on were: predator ID and foraging techniques. the Face of Everyman interrupted; suggesting that he was willing to approach a large cat food maker with an offer of selling them the naming rights to this small remote school house. The ladies pretended that hadn’t heard a word that the venerable sage had uttered.
Perseid
Sartorial Style
Button Hook and Collar Stay are traveling vintage haberdashers. Twice a year they call on the Face of Everyman to fill their order books with his unique requirements. This year he needed celluloid shirt collars in various neck sizes as well as heights. Suitable ties and three silver handled walking sticks. No one at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had ever actually seen E dressed in such attire but his reminiscence of those bygone eras of sartorial style appealed to everyone.
Scientific Papers
Couriers outbound on a small UFO stopped by the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa to encourage the Face of Everyman to complete his research papers for review in time to be presented at the conference in October when the asteroid 2012 TC4 passed between the earth and the moon. E pleaded for more time. He hadn’t completed his calculations and summary on his most learned paper re: that upstart contrarian 2015 BZ509. He needed time. He would have to forgo Bridge Club on Tuesday nights.
Link leaves this site: https://tinyurl.com/ycsngzht
Baby Huey
Johnny Dark Eyes was released from two weeks quarantine and incarceration at the village pet store. He returned to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa to discover he was the proud father of a Brown Headed Cow Bird. the Face of Everyman suggested that J join a local support group on the “Love, Care and Feeding of Parasitic Foster Hatchlings”. As a typical rogue and scofflaw he approached parenting head on … “Boy could Baby Huey put away the chow!”
Lawsuit
Weeks ago the Face of Everyman had prematurely handed out a few promotional vouchers for his Sweat Lodge. The County had yet to authorized its use at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Now here was an irate customer with his legal counsel claiming irreparable harm to his health and plumage. It seems that the during the test phase of the mist maker the mist was mistakenly thought to be emanating from a sweat lodge. Without realizing the deleterious effects of long term exposure; the customer spent the night . . .
Waiting
The mist maker was temporarily removed from the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. County Health was reviewing the facts surrounding the Face of Everyman’s rapid on set of PTSD attributed to this new feature. Disappointment ran high with local song birds and guests who seemed little effected by traumatic episodes of repressed long term memory. Most hung around expectantly until lunch was served on the patio.
Moscow 1812
the Face of Everyman was overcome by a sudden attack of PTSD. The newly installed mist maker at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had recreated a scene in his mind which he had long suppressed. As Napoleon’s forces began a siege of Moscow they ran out of cannon balls. An enterprising gunner grabbed whatever rock was at hand . . .
Even after two hundred years the venerable sage was traumatized by flash backs to that terrible moment.
Conduit
Communications were difficult between birds of different species. the Face of Everyman tried to help whenever possible. Skylar asked where one might find the best place to forage for beetles in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Red Robin responded by saying where the best worms could be found. E liked to think of himself as a conduit thru which the little people could make themselves understood. He answered each question with, he thought, helpful information.
Amber Alert
The Amber Alert had startled everybody. Thruout the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa phones rang, klaxons blared. In the end, the Face of Everyman pieced together the whole story: Dad had removed the training wheels from lil’ Rodney‘s new bike. The fledgling Robin took a spill and fell into a bed of thick ferns. He could neither be seen nor heard for sometime. At last the sheriff’s posse reunited the frantic parents with their only heir. Mom insisted that the bike be sold on eBay that night.
It was after midnight when Rocky discovered the face of Everyman quietly moaning. It seems that the venerable sage turned his head too quickly to catch sight of a meteor leaving a long trail thru the dark skies over the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Rocky slowly turned E’s head back to normal orientation. Two weeks of physical therapy and that stiff neck would be as good as new.