the Face of Everyman felt as tho’ he were in a Shakespearean play. Treachery seemed everywhere. Alas, to sleep, perchance to dream . . . Roving bandits seemed to control the entire Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. If only Batman and Robin hadn’t retired. The venerable sage deeply regretted yard-selling the search light used to summon the dynamic duo.
On Thin Air
A rare phenomenon illustrates how cold it at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. It is so cold that the Towhee slipped on thin air. the Face of Everyman tried to calculate the odds of this event being caught on camera. The American Robin and White-crowned Sparrow are eye witnesses and think of it as a spiritual event. A sign perhaps.
Boy Scout Saves Rock
Ellison knew that he had but a few precious moments to spare if he had any hope in resuscitating the Face of Everyman. Using techniques that he had learned in Boy Scout Troop 108 of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa he hoped to breath life back into the venerable sage. Ellison watched closely. At last there was a flickering eye lid followed by a wheeze and a cough. Once again the 4.5 billion year old artfully carved chunk of basalt had escaped the jaws of death.
Indefatigable
Everywhere that Ozwald looked he saw that the Ice Walkers had been here and had moved on; perhaps North beyond the wall. The entire landscape of the vast Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was covered in snow and ice. Even ever indefatigable the Face of Everyman was locked in ice and appeared a goner.
“Well, it’s been a quiet week in . . .”
Out along a remote part of the Pacific Flyway where the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa hosts a small variety of birds, bookings were off and Ball Room entertainment didn’t resume till after the Lunar New Year. The casinos had grabbed up all the Top 40 names. It was Sabeal who thought up the idea that all the Gals should start wearing their Spring colors and liven up the place. All the Guys, including the Face of Everyman, grumbled and procrastinated for as long as possible.
Hercules
Using sketchy bio-metrics the forensic security team at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was able to ID this intruder. Year old data suggested that this is Hercules, a semi-feral cat whose “owners” are off on a Snowbird camping trip. the Face of Everyman had pangs of conscience as it was he who sold the couple the Cat-o-matic 30 Day Feeder with a complementary bag of dry cat food. Assuring them that their beloved pet, who resided in the garage, would never ever stray.
Dark Web
Natasha had become tired of her single life style at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Reluctantly she turned to the Dark Web for a selection of Russian “mail order” grooms. She was pleased with her choice but sought a second opinion from the Face of Everyman.
Ergo ipso facto
Filbert was confused by the news that Star fish were dying and thus allowing Sea Urchins to proliferate and kill off forests of sea weed. In any case he wanted to check on his trove of fresh water abalone; native only to these waters. The Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was a sanctuary; the taking fresh water abalone was prohibited. the Face of Everyman applied his situational ethics algorithm: He himself had never seen one; ergo ipso facto one cannot poach something that doesn’t exist.
Oracle of Delphi
Honeywell came to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa to explore support for his candidacy. The Oracle of Delphi was rumored to reside hereabouts. When he put the question to Pythia, she gave no immediate response. the Face of Everyman’s shocked and dumbfounded look should have been all he needed to know.
Gastronomic Delights
State Fish and Wildlife inspectors were dumbfounded to realize that Rocky was actually washing his peanut butter sandwich. They replayed the footage of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa security camera again and again. It was the Face of Everyman who verified their findings. Orts had drifted his way and channeled his dreams into a series of gastronomic delights.
torkelsbirds 