Once again Lulu found herself high and dry in the Dating Game. These were her choices for lunch at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa First Tuesday luncheon get together. These guys all looked like losers. Her angry letter to The Village Herald would castigate the Face of Everyman for not stirring the pot more for better results, better attendance. Her doggy bag was her only consolation as she watched the nightly news on TV. 
Brainchild
The new guest was part of the Writers Group and Golf Package at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. It was the marketing brainchild of the Face of Everyman. When ‘writer’s block’ hit; you played a round of golf or, at the very least, hit the driving range and shot a bucket of balls. It was touted as very therapeutic. Third quarter sales were at an all time high.
Finder’s Fee
Everyone looked up. The sound was from a seaplane about to land at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Probably filled with land speculators and crafty bankers. Was the face of Everyman about to get rich on a finder’s fee? Why would anyone jump to that conclusion? 
Solar
Because of a clerical error the utility bill payments for the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa were not credited to their account. the Face of Everyman tried to negotiate an audit and payment schedule but his actions failed. Without natural gas and electricity guests resorted to solar heating where possible. Sunning spots went at premium prices.
Daylight
The fantastic aroma of Turkey, giblets and gravy, was more than Farnsworth could ignore. In broad daylight he was drawn irresistibly to the nexus. Chefs at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa were preparing a holiday meal to be remembered. the Face of Everyman brought in some of his Mom’s early gluten free recipes. They were well received. 
Thanksgiving
Each Thanksgiving was much the same: freeloaders from nearby sanctuaries showed up make sure that the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa would have dishes to meet their unique dietary needs. the Face of Everyman was “tearing his hair out.” “Could no one just be thankful for a good meal?” The Chef had received a good price on meal worms. Protein should be a part of everyone’s diet.
Big Guy
Big Guy came by the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa looking for a few strays. the Face of Everyman could only recall seeing Moms with fawns; hardly anything that would interest this carnal beast. Big Guy moved on; perhaps his luck would change once he got to the big timber stand on the hill. Everyman felt justified in a small lie and uncrossed his fingers.
Posturing
Cranston had an elevated sense of self-esteem; everywhere he went in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa he struck a pose. the Face of Everyman would assess the value of each as to: a) gravitas, b) heroism, c) leadership and so on. Those with the highest scores would be saved; later to be cast in bronze should Cranston ever amount to anything.
Whirling Disorder
A rare case of Whirling Disorder was reported by the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa Family Clinic. A gene was expressing itself among a few family members from a remote part of the Pacific Flyway. As music played those afflicted began to whirl. the Face of Everyman took copious notes in preparation for yet another scholarly paper.
Football Pool
Clancy was urging the Face of Everyman to place wagers in his Thanksgiving Day Football Pool. A modest fifty cent wager on each of the several holiday games could reap big payouts the furry gamester persisted. On weekends the venerable sage made full use of Foggy Bottoms Corporate Cray super-computers. Clancy was asked to return this afternoon after the printouts had been analyzed. A discrete call to Las Vegas would guide the ancient one in his final choices. 
torkelsbirds 