For months Roscoe had planned a daring daylight raid on a clandestine Crawdad mill hidden somewhere on the vast grounds of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. It was meant to be a hit and run operation but somehow he got into a deep philosophical discussion with the Face of Everyman over the nutritional merits of crayfish over the common garden slug. Poor Roscoe, he returned home empty handed and had to be satisfied with dumpster diving for someones discarded dried figs.
Furcula
In typical perverse action the Juke twins, Bobby and Betty fought over a dried up furcula left behind by rogue Crows who frequently swept through the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa preying on innocent wildlife. the Face of Everyman heard only the snap of the bone; not the wishes. He kept his thoughts to himself, recalling with relish his last Coquelet.
Fur Coat
Agnes wore her new fur coat purchased with her winnings from the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa Casino. The other guests saw right through her attempt at a vulgar and ostentatious display of wealth. In retribution, some guests turned away and one remarked how warm the day was. the Face of Everyman remained mute as he was so often wont to do.
Art Theft
A daring daylight theft of art occurred at the posh gallery near the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Stolen was an alabaster carving, an octopus created by a gifted but obscure artist. Security camera footage failed to give meaningful clues to the identity of the thieves. Even the Face of Everyman, the only eye witness, was flummoxed.
Cosmic
As Cosmic forces swept the Earth, no place was more effected than the imaginary bird land known as the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Amateur scientists estimate that gravity momentarily increased ten-fold. Seen above in a clip from the security camera is Mullard, a local, unable to resist this force and escape. Even the Face of Everyman regretted the few extra pounds he had gained lately because of his new craving for pumpkin pie.
Simple Syrup
Prairie Flower was in search of breakfast. It was too early for some flowers to be open and nectar flowing. Lately, to get her day going, she had resorted to stopping by the lounge at Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa for a shot of simple syrup with a water back . Today the lounge remained closed. In desperation she turned to the Face of Everyman. Reluctantly the venerable sage shared a dollop of his award winning Chokecherry syrup meant for his short stack.
Fall Rains
Heavy Fall rains brought the Robins back to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa to forage for the succulent worms that perhaps could be found only in this remote region of the Pacific flyway. the Face of Everyman resumed his export mail order business shipping up to six crates a week of his signature brand Olympic Select Worms to Koi farms in the orient where they were the preferred dietary supplement.
Boo
Preschoolers from the Montetorkie Day Care were invited to carve pumpkins for the Halloween festivities at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. the Face of Everyman thought that he had provided adequate supervision until . . . until someone realized that little Jimmy knew morse code.
October Rain
A horrific storm struck the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The was no way that the Face of Everyman could find shelter. Pelting rain and lightning bolts scared the bejeebers out of everybody.
It rained and it rained and rained and rained
The average fall was well maintained
And when the tracks were simply bogs
It started raining cats and dogs
After a drought of half an hour
We had a most refreshing shower
And then the most curious thing of all
A gentle rain began to fall
Next day was also fairly dry
Save for the deluge from the sky
Which wetted the party to the skin
And after that the rain set in
— Anonymous tramper, 1984
Field Trials
TULA, guardian of the manor house, returned from Miss Thistlewaite’s obedience school for elderly cats. She immediately forgot ever skill that she had acquired except one: Pointing. As a “practical joke” the Face of Everyman signed Tula up for the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa Sportsmen Club field trials. No one was more surprised than her mistress when Tula was awarded a second prize and ribbon. She could of easily taken the First from the English Setter and Labrador Retriever, but she was weak in flushing game and retrieving.
torkelsbirds 