Erlene posed for over a hundred glamour shots in the early morning hours at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. She wanted a provocative pose to share with her new online contact Billy Bob. the Face of Everyman furnished contraband cigarettes for several takes meant to be sexy but they quickly unraveled. In the end it was all for nought. Billy Bob was searching for a nest builder. Someone to extend his legacy down thru the ages. Besides his condo had a non-smoking deed restriction.
Game Show
Bob and Ethel won an all expense paid vacation at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa on a national TV game show. Unfortunately their booking coincided with an outbreak of Avian Flu. Most of the staff was in strict quarantine. the Face of Everyman was immune and became their most boring constant companion. By late afternoon they had heard all of his Shakespearean Jokes.
Prom Night
Rodney wasn’t sure that spiky hair was still a style. Perhaps a Mohawk would be a better choice for Prom Night. the Face of Everyman was ambiguous. Aside from donning mating colors few style choices changed throughout the years at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. In the end Rodney and his prom date went in conventional attire.
TED Talk
This weeks TED Talk at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was so inspirational that Armstrong left the theater with a clear mandate: spread his wings; be all he could be. the Face of Everyman wished that he could have heard such an uplifting and influencing presentation when he was in his formative years. No telling where he might be now.
Avenging Angel
At a glance the Face of Everyman knew that his time was up. The Avenging Angel was fluttering down to claim his mortal soul. “Mother of Mercy. Can this be the end of the Venerable Sage?” Moments later he could breathe a sigh of relief; he was safely in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The remainder of the day was anticlimatic.
Soak Before Cracking
Erstwhile longed to be back in the circus. Foraging for food was often laborious even at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The meats of the sunflower seed seemed a poor reward for soaking before cracking. Back in the circus he had been painted up as a Mynah bird and mimicked peoples speech and was rewarded with treats plus three squares a day. the Face of Everyman offered Erstwhile a contract but couldn’t meet the generous benefits that the circus provided.
High Alert
Once again The Trixster tried to evade detection by the hi-tech security system protecting the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The klaxons howled alerting even the dosing the Face of Everyman of this dawn intrusion. The venerable sage tried to evaluate where on the food chain did a Coyote place song birds and roving house cats.
Esperanto
Rocky had been up all night prepping for his appearance on Jeopardy, the long running TV game show. He was almost too tired to sleep. Names, dates and formulas filled his head. the Face of Everyman had agreed to tutor this brilliant scallywag on his promise to never again spin the venerable sage like a child’s top. Rocky’s episode will be recorded on this very spot in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa and released soon as a Summer Series on a yet unnamed streaming channel. Subtitles in Esperanto will be offered.
Offspring
The Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa held morning swimming lessons for pre-schoolers. Even before his first cup of coffee the Face of Everyman was forced to endure the crying, splashing, yelling and near cacophony of the fledglings. Over four billion years ago the venerable sage had sworn not to marry and have offspring. He was frequently reminded of his solemn oath.
Glossy Prints
Benchley couldn’t believe his eyes. This must be the lost Aztec city of corn that he had heard so much about. Who would leave such bounty laying about. And sunflower seeds just for the cracking. the Face of Everyman felt compelled to speak up and clarify a few points. First, this place was known as the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Secondly, the food was bait from the kindly ol’ pensioner meant to to attract song birds into camera range. Thirdly, Benchley was welcome to return and pose for a portrait any time he chose. Glossy prints could be ordered online.
torkelsbirds 