Off-term elections were becoming the new norm at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. A seat on the Arts Commission urgently needed to be filled. Funston called a press conference to announce his “hat in the ring”. His comportment was almost presidential. F’s choice of the Face of Everyman as the venue was not lost on members of the Fourth estate.
Bubbles
Wayne was distraught. He had become involved in a popular vertical marketing scheme. Now they wanted their money. He hadn’t sold any product and had disposed of what little he had received. The telltale sign of bubbles on the waters of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa suggested some contaminate was present. the Face of Everyman could not offer W a solution. But, he was enjoying the fresh minty flavor of his surroundings. It tasted much like a well advertised mouth wash.
Shenandoah
Shenandoah ambled through the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. He stopped briefly to pay his respects to the Face of Everyman, the local leading light and spiritual leader. He was really angling to become the Deer Totem for any of the local civic service groups. The venerable sage was at a loss to offer any endorsement. All assignments were booked till the Fall. Unless, of course, he didn’t mind a temp position as totem for the Roadside Clean-up Crew. They weren’t reverent and only needed someone looking after their well being on Saturday mornings.
Truce
For the most part, the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was a happy and friendly place. One long standing feud occasionally surfaced. The animosity between Robespierre and Mullard went so far back in time that neither recalled how it had started. the Face of Everyman urged them to form a truce and “bury the hatchet”. The metaphor was lost on these determined foes.
Snail Mail
Pokey was new on the delivery route to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The draw bridge had been down when he arrived burdened with the usual junk mail for the Face of Everyman. Now what? Was this some kind joke? Turns out, that while chatting with the venerable sage, the bridge had been removed for the annual safety inspection. “Not to worry”, said E. “I’ll call the helicopter rescue team.” Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night . . .
Hangman
Once a year, down at the rock quarry, the Face of Everyman joined the remaining members of his old Civil Defense Fire Brigade. Someone’s guest brought enough Okolehao to float the RMS Titanic. Unlikely stories were retold and high old times were relived till the moon was about to set. Everyman made it home to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa, but had troubling dreams. He awoke with a start. The menacing image of a Hangman above his groggy head. Henceforth, he vowed, to stick to Peppermint Schnapps.
Jackdaw
Jackdaw had been born with an extremely rare condition; best described as alternating lazy eye. The modest clinic at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was without resources to correct this abnormality. J’s parents became resigned and were about to move to a safer location. While deep in transcendental meditation the Face of Everyman envisioned small eye-glasses with kaleidoscope lenses. Within hours he had dashed off a learned paper for presentation at the annual eye wear congress in Stockholm and contracted with B & L to fabricate a series of prototypes. The young Crow went on to become a famous sideshow trick-shot artist. Detractors insist that he has an unfair advantage.
Mendicant
The colorful multi-lingual handbills tacked up at feeding stations along the flyway described the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa with glowing words. Many were merely buzz words: paradise, organic forage, remote, banana-belt, safe surroundings. Dante was tired of his hand-to-mouth existence; it was time to settle down. the Face of Everyman pointed out a few mature trees that still had spacious rooms at the mid-level branches. Further, confided the venerable sage, Cherry picking season was soon and primo Sunflowers seeds could be expected in the Fall.
Tequilla Surprise
What had started as the annual Tequilla Taste and Naming Festival at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa, got out of hand about the third flight. the Face of Everyman sought opinions of his home brew Tequilla and often accepted suggestions as to a suitable name for his product if bottled and sold. Poor Rodney had no idea that he was allergic to Mexican Sunshine. He remained overnight at the Clinic for observation. All agreed that this production run should be labeled “Buckeroo”. The venerable sage sold out by sundown.
Dating
Jackie sensed that eDating had made a grievous error. Her understanding: lunch with Handsome Ransom at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. She had specifically checked “No Speed Dating” on her free trial application. Bashful Bobby would just have to re-book. the Face of Everyman offered a possible solution. Why not a half Vegan Cobb salad with Ransom and later, the Chef’s renown Sachertorte with Bobby?
torkelsbirds 