Members of the elite met to choose a password for entrance to the Bohemian Thicket for the New Year’s festivities at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The chairman could hardly hold the attention of the members long enough to reach a conclusion. Finally he gaveled out the meeting. It would serve them right. Robins don’t stay up late; they are early risers. the Face of Everyman regretted the income lost from not hosting such a prestigious group.
Greed
Greed and Sloth contributed to this six pigeon pile up on I-5. There were no injuries but several participants were taken to the clinic at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa; checked and released. the Face of Everyman added that the sense of entitlement was also a contributing factor. The venerable sage had little respect for these greedy free loaders. 
NFL Football
It was prime time NFL Sunday football. the Face of Everyman was torn as to how to wager. This era he was a SeaHawk fan. In 20 million years he would be in 49er territory. He wagers were part of his “permanent record”. Could he then pass himself off as a ’49er gold seeker? Would it matter to his critics that he was a founding father of “E Clampus Vitus?” He hedged and phoned in a second bet using his street name: Black Rock.
Horoscopes
With the New Year approaching folks in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa had an eye on the future. Concerned clients wanted a new horoscope cast for the year 2020. With the number of requests he had been receiving the Face of Everyman was glad that he had given up using fresh chicken entrails. The alignment of the stars offered a much cleaner and more readable casting. 
Boxing Day
Rupert had an overwhelming sense of guilt. Yesterday was Boxing Day and he had failed to perform even the simplest of rituals. He considered for a moment how he might redeem himself. Alas, the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was not a place that lent itself to gift box or alms giving. the Face of Everyman tried to assuage Rupert’s feelings by suggesting he give a talk about what this unique holiday meant to him; or something.
Dark Days
It was back to the drawing board for the Face of Everyman. His attempts at making the first solar powered bird were not achieving his goals. He had carefully read every “Tom Swift and his Electric _____” book in the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa library and it was clear that he was close. It came down to solar energy from the Sun. This week this faraway outpost on the Pacific Flyway recorded the darkest day ever in historical records. The venerable sage postponed further test until after the Spring Equinox. 
Empathy
Johnny Dark Eyes was a bit suspicious of the couple next to him; their markings looked strange. Only a handful of songbirds wintered over at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Off season was the best time for the Face of Everyman to replenish the free nesting materials bin. Turns out those folks missed the last bus to Mexico weeks ago. Johnny wanted to start a Go Fund Me page for them but thought better of it. But, he had empathy.
Food Chain
A large school of shrimp had entered the waters of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. They were pursued by Smelt who in turn were pursued by the Gulls. the Face of Everyman didn’t fit neatly into the food chain but that sharp beak was something to avoid.
Office Party
The Christmas office party at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was sluggish. Salaried workers were slow to mix with hourly coworkers. the Face of Everyman judiciously added a jeroboam of the bubbly to the punch bowl; then laced the party-mix with jalapeno sauce and stood back. 
M. E.
An atmospheric river inundated the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. The local Medical Examiner stopped by to check on the venerable sage. His assessment of the situation caused him to ask if he could notify any next of kin. This flustered the Face of Everyman so much that he nearly leaped out of the water to strangle the meddlesome sawbones.
torkelsbirds 