The Dark Lord appeared in response to complaints from Crow constituents about the poor selection of appropriate foods at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa luncheon buffet. the Face of Everyman was quick to respond: A Crow family had a nest nearby and were about infrequently. Roving flocks were gracious enough to not intrude. In the end a compromise was reached; a small amount of artisan bread would be would be made available; subject to plundering by Raccoons, Dogs and Herring Gulls. The outcome could give politics a good name.
Cherry Filching
Rocky had been filching red cherries from the kindly ol’ pensioner’s tree. He held up a paw to show the Face of Everyman the deep red color and begged to wash up as raccoons are want to do. The Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was very particular about the purity of the water. However, the venerable sage found the the thought of cherry flavored water intriguing. “Perhaps, just this once.”
Passports
With Summer travel hitting new peaks, the Face of Everyman made a modest investment in a Passport Photo Kiosk. The franchise did poorly at first as the denizens of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa never really understood the strict instructions involved.
Diondra
Her parents had named her Diondra (Lady of the Sacred Spring). Most fitting for a youngster born at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa, site of the Spring of Perpetual Giving. Poor old the Face of Everyman he had to avert his gaze each time Diondra stumbled and fell. The gal was without an ounce of poise.
The High Court
The High Court met at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa to consider the merits of a case alleging poor quality of food served by the kindly ol’ pensioner. After hearing arguments they adjourned for a sumptuous lunch prepared by a renown executive chef. To sway the Court, the Face of Everyman had a few bottles of his best single malt Scotch and a box of fine Cuban cigars placed on a nearby tea cart. The case was dismissed without prejudice.
Fusion
On quiet mornings poolside at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa, before the Cabana boys had set out the chairs, the Face of Everyman liked to snap his fingers and watch isotopes of hydrogen collide. The resulting plasma warmed his stone cold Danish and lukewarm Coffee.
Talk?
Theirs was the silent marriage of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Each used passive aggressive techniques in what little communications they had. the Face of Everyman could stand it no longer. At last he said, “Can we talk?”
Home Schooling
Mom brought Jewel to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Both were eager to show the Face of Everyman the progress that the little one had made in home schooling. Without prompting Jewel could demonstrate her understanding of the following: Stay, Dog, Car, Not Safe, Hide and Cross Now. The venerable sage was about to teach her how to conjugate a few simple Latin verbs; but thought better of it.
Coyote
Under cover of the predawn darkness a Coyote attempted to penetrate the security defenses of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Alert citizens, backed by the Face of Everyman, drove off the esurient villain with old shoes and whatever else was handy.
ACLU
With the help of the ACLU Panther won the right to pass thru the vast grounds of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa; a UNESCO protected avian sanctuary. At certain times she has to be escorted by the resident cat of the manor house, Tula’. the Face of Everyman preached Civil Liberties for all; but Feral Cats came near the bottom of the list.
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