the Face of Everyman tried to explain to Scrappy that he was unsuitable for the job. The Ad on Craig’s List was for a Service Animal that would remain in the grand lobby of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa and provide comfort to those guests in distress. The venerable sage pointed out that, by the cut of his jib, he was best at catching rats, mice and gophers. This job would go to someone more docile; perhaps a Lab or a Golden Retriever. Scrappy went home and put his collar on in order to look more respectable for his next job interview. Luckily all his shots were up to date.
Rapscallion
Robespierre returned to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa from thirty days of house arrest. He was keeping a low profile. the Face of Everyman tried to chat him up but “R” kept his distance. Maybe when the old rapscallion had settle in he’d feel more like chatting.
IRS Agent
The IRS agent was clear. He was here to look at the books of an import company of which the Face of Everyman was listed as CEO. The venerable sage had so many small and varied interests that surely he couldn’t be expected to recall any particular one at a moments notice. The agent was gruff and all business, yet he gave “E” till Tuesday to meet his demands. Everyman thought: “Better call . . .”
New Suits
Taco and Paco were all dressed up in their new outfits. With time on their hands they decided to hang out at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa with the hope that the girls might notice them. About all that happened was that the Face of Everyman got tired of Paco standing on his face and asked him to leave. With that, the boys went foraging for lunch.
Not To Scale
A new family had heard of the magical land of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa. Their first visit was a disappointment. They were not to scale; too large. the Face of Everyman suggested that they bathe at the fountain in the nearby village. They were nice enough . . . but “E” knew that they would be back.
Rant and Rave
It wasn’t like Melonie to whine or grouse but she had a dislike for the Snowbirds who went off somewhere during the Winter then returned to the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa taking over some of the best nesting sites without so much as asking. the Face of Everyman suggested that she submit a “rant” to the village newspaper’s rant & rave column. She’d feel much better if she did.
Subwoofer
Despite the wet weather of April, cats continued to test the defenses of the Foggy Bottom Resort and Spa. Security forces held off sounding the alarm. Instead a recording of the Face of Everyman’s soliloquy from “Hamlet” played at half speed usually drove off the intruder.
Kite
It was Jimmy’s turn to be the Kite. Light butcher’s twine from the award winning kitchen of the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa was tied to his legs. A good length was played out then he swooped and soared. the Face of Everyman recalled his early days of competition kite flying. In his own mind he introduced the sport to the folks at Weifang, China.
Lampblack
Leander was precocious; often to a fault. He arrived at the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa a week or more ahead of the others. Unfortunately his make-up kit was on another flight. He was forced to beg the Face of Everyman for a smidgen of lampblack to touch up his pale and incomplete top knot. He needed to appear as an adult in mating colors when he met new folks on his way north to Canada.
High Winds
Cheeky brought the bad news that high winds were expected to hit the Foggy Bottoms Resort and Spa within the hour. To the Face of Everyman that meant cancelling another day of filming his epic: “The Battle of Thermopylae”. Perhaps he should have sold the script to NETFLIX when he had the chance.
torkelsbirds 